Well it's been nearly a millennium since my last post; what do you mean you didn't know there were a 1,000 years between 2011 and 2012? Just kidding ;)

It had been a whirlwind set of months between life and grad school. Grad School sucked me into a black hole vortex of non-stop work until late-December which I didn't recover from until late January, which is when the new semester began. XD How is that for timing?

I got a full-time job at my library, right when I was about to leave and move home. It has brought with it though confirmation that I do not want to stay in this library system. They have taken one of my joys and replaced it with a woe; that might as well be trying to convince me tofu is as delicious as a cheeseburger. I will no longer be working with the teens, I will now be doing story times. I take solace in the shock many of my coworkers have expressed at this revelation, I take great annoyance in everyone assuring me that I will be fine and do great.
Of course I'll do great I'm the best in the world! But I question my heart which loves another, as it so often does, and the lack of passion it will have for the task. When my heart is passionate about something it can move mountains, and when it is not an ant hill is too great. It will be what it is for now I suppose.

On the apartment front a search for a new place is underway, still at the same old place until then. I swear my neighbors find new ways to be annoying all the time. > _ <

In other unsurprising news I am still completely hopeless when it comes to talking with guys. I am too shy to be bold and say anything, and my subtle is too quiet (see Fluttershy ). Shy Awkward Geek Girl? Why yes I am.
In semi-related news I managed to break a heart, which was so not fun. To quote one my favorite songs, "I drove a nail in the bottom of my walking boot/so I wail every time I hit the floor" pretty much sums up how that is going.

On the gaming front Exalted is going quite well. Next Session seems complicatedly far away due to the difficult of coordinating 13 different schedules. (BOO!) The bright spot of all this is having more time to write stuff and working on an epic side project. Oh, and Happy 1st Anniversary Exalted Game!

I should be getting back to my homework now and hopefully will post again before long.

-The Meep (aka Fluttershy)

I tripped over a blog that does a feature called Tattoo Tuesday. Personally I am a fan of tattoos and, had I the money, would like to get one or so someday. I know my parents are not fans of them but there are something that I hold dear enough to want a tattoo.

When I mentioned this to a friend he asked what I would get as a tattoo. Something literary, something spiritual, and something geeky.

Literary:
"Not all those who wander are lost"
"Quoth the Raven Nevermore"
"The Road Less Traveled"

Spiritual:
Something from Ecclesiastes most likely

Ecclesiastes 1:14
"I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind"

Ecclesiastes 3:1
"There is a time for everything. And there is a time for everything under heaven--"

Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope."

Maybe Ecc. 1:14 & 3:1, Jer. 29:11

Geeky:
d20 & d10 (the dice are winning)
Cherry Blossoms

If I ever get married I would like to get something on my ring finger, a constant symbol and expression.

Any tattoos I might get are still a long way off, just gives me more time to think and consider. For now I will be content with dreaming.

-Meep Out-

OMG! It's Friday! Which means Fiction Friday! And what do you know this writer actually remember who to type words into sort of sentences and post them on the interwebz! Woot! So I'm back for an edition of Fiction Friday. This idea struck me Wed. afternoon and I started scribbling it that night. Not sure where it is going yet or if I develop it, but you never know.
Enjoy.

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SHADOW

I am a shadow
A gray figure behind
Silent
Ethereal
Dark

Sometimes you see me
Other times I vanish
Faded
Blurred
Overlooked

I am always there
Right there with you
Watching
Waiting
Withdrawn

Do not forget, I
See All and Remember


Chapter 1

I stood there, looking at the front door, the last barrier between me and the outside world. I wanted to turn around and go back up to my room, close the door and lose myself in worlds of fantastic creatures and places. My parents insisted that I go to school to learn, yeah right, they just wanted me out of the house. What was I learning at school that I couldn’t at home?

Most of my teachers used textbooks, overly large collections of pages that would leave me with back problems. Their lectures could be recorded in a variety of ways so that I didn’t miss out on them. I could find some place to work out, go to the gym or community center, maybe, to get exercise. We had a basketball hoop out back, I had a bike, and there was probably a tennis racket and some other stuff buried in the garage. It’s not like anyone would miss me at school, so why did I need to go?

To socialize with my peers is what they told me. Socialize? Who did they think they were kidding? Don’t get me wrong I can be social, but socialize with my peers? Let’s be honest here for a minute, socialize with my peers is just the friendly way of saying suffer torment at the merciless hands of my peers, and for what? Wouldn’t we all like to know…Wouldn’t I love to know…

Why weren’t my teachers teaching that in class? I would be ten times as engaged in discussions and all that stuff if they taught things that mattered to me. Why your peers torment you 101, How to successfully suffer getting stuffed in your locker 203, useful topics and crap like that. Seriously I would rather take a class on socializing than actually do it, don’t get me wrong I find people fascinating but I like to watch their antics, not be beaten down by them.
“Hurry up you’ll be late,” says my Mother giving me a nudge towards the door.

Here we go again; grabbing my house key and stuffing it in my backpack I’m out the door, abandoning my last barrier, and walking down the driveway my eyes already scanning the landscape, all the locals live the next block over or so, so I usually don’t encounter them until the bus stop. As I approach I can see one of them standing there, reminding me of a buzzard circling a dead body. I would turn back but I’ve already been spotted, to run would be cowardly.

As I reach the bus stop I try to close out their words but with little success. My friends arrive bringing some small refuge, it’s a numbers game in this place and together we actually win a little. The bus arrives and carries us to school, delivering us like convicts to the prison, that’s really what it feels like too.

Reaching my class I immediately begin to lose the numbers game, I’m in a class with no friends this year. Whatever system they used really dealt me a crap hand this year. A teacher who hates me, classmates who acknowledge me only when they need a verbal punching bag, this year is trying my patience and I am so ready to leave it behind.
A stop at my locker and I move into the classroom staying quiet and keeping my head down, they can’t target you if they don’t notice you, I hope. I make it to my seat and pull out my book starting to read while I have a few minutes of peaceful non-existence. The bell rings and soon the day has begun rolling dragging me along with it, sometimes I try to fight it but usually I just let it run wild. I’m watching the clock waiting for my escape to begin; my math skills are pretty miserable so they send me for extra tutoring, where I have to deal with other kids who aren’t very good at math, you’d think that would give us a common bond, nope. We’re all lone wolves separated from our packs and sometimes that doesn’t go so well for us, bet that teacher doesn’t even know it either.

I wonder if teachers have a class on learning to ignore the down trodden students. School administrators certainly must have aced this class, there’s no way that all this could go on without their notice. How come it seems the only people I am invisible to are the ones who should be paying attention and noticing things like this? I hate this place.

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-Meep